Project Gideon 2014: Notes from the Second Session with Pastor Van Moody

What follows is a transcript of my notes from the second session at PROJECT GIDEON.  The speaker for this session was Pastor Van Moody. 

These notes were taken on February 13th.

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PROJECT GIDEON

General Session 2:  Pastor Van Moody

--I want to serve you today

--Share from Book, The people factor

--the marketplace is eating this up; business arena

--the children of darkness are often wiser than children of light; they use God's principles

--Teaching from the book

Assignment:  pour a gallon in a cup

Deposit things in your life

Why the Ppl factor?

1. Stats suggest avg American reads one book a year

--leaders in body of Christ--read Word and one bk

--challenge: before May, get and read the Ppl factor

--22 years of preaching and pastoring.  Discovered most ppl have struggle with ppl, not God

--when you peel away the layers, core of struggle, not with God, it's with his ppl

--if it were not for Christians, there would be more Christians --Martin Luther

--in and out of church

--60-80 percent of issues have everything to do with relational issues (not giftings and talents)  Majority in businesses are struggling b/c ppl can't get along with each other

Prove 13:20: He who walks with the wise grows wise, but a companion of fools suffer harm

--No such thing as neutral relationship

--every relationship you have infl you in some shape or form

--no such thing as casual relationship

--avg of five ppl you spend the most time with 

--I can tell you where you'll be by studying who you spend the most time around

--you have some kind of relationship with everybody, and all of the relations are shaping, influencing you, lifting you up

--wrong relationships will keep you tethered to mediocrity and derail your future

--you can be gifted, anointing, enamored with the anointing, what is your undoing is your inability to do relationships 

--stunt growth and prevent achievement

--this is church, history, etc.

--Biggest struggle didn't have anything to do with their gifting or talent

--(ted haggard, tiger woods, arnie schwarzenegger, Philip Seymour Hoffman...)

--ppl are not looking at giftings; but at his failures

--permanent blemish, scars due to relationships

--cutting statement:  reporters, to everybody except those who knew him, his death came as a surprise

--everyone who knew him knew he had a death threat

--school, conferences, we arent' prepared for relationships we have to do well

--kingdom of God revolves around relationship; everything in the world; body of Christ; we get vertical aspect; cross

--what we don't well is the horizontal realities of our faith

--Love your neighbor as yourself  it has both horizontal and vertical beam

--reconcile world to God and each other

--hanging between two faiths; nobody shouts right here

--in leadership, frustrated:  struggle with ppl

--just love God, love your neighbor

--not simple; people are nuanced, relationships

--what makes a relationship healthy and /or toxic

--Matt. 16: Law of Constructive transition

--major relations of the past can be stumblin block of future

--petros, upon this rock; get behind me Satan

Peter goes from building block to stumbling block

--sometimes relationships good building aren't good for you as you go on

--Law of True Value:  sometimes the most visible in your life are not the most valuable:  Zipporah;  she was not visible, not valuable;

--we emphasize the front and center, not always ppl front and center

--ppl praying for you, covering you, text message, 

--often, we sacrifice valuable the valuable ppl for the visible ppl

--know diff halfway friends and covenant partners; disappointment:  thought the friend was covenant  partners

--some friends like milk--for a short time and expiration

--I wrote the book I wish someone would have given me 25 years ago

--some of greatest heartaches due to ppl failures; 

--what I craved was someone to teach me how to deal with ppl

--through tears, pain, all I had word of God

--through relationships that hurt and disappointed; sacrificed for; searching scripture

--everything God showed me in his word, I put in the Word of God

--must have a lens to see it.

--The Journey Matters:  Understanding the Process of Great Relationships

Number one:  I gave too much too soon

--ex: a guy that looked good and mishandled everything; he resigned b/c I'm frustrated b/c I wanted pastor to be my best friend, wanted to have exp with pastor; what he wanted all access to pastor; and wanted to dabble in other ministries;  what I learned:

Mathematical Equation

too much + too soon + too freely = disaster

--we are hurt unnecessarily; 

--the journey matters; you've got to go through things w ppl to know who they really are

--relationship only a click a way:  lie from hell today; we need to walk with ppl for a period of time

--great relationships are not born over night, they take time but are worth it.

--since the beg of time, he's used same 2 things:  His Word and a person

--you can't find a great moment in your life that a person wasn't involved

--partnership between God's word and the person

--Significance of doing relationships well; God will bless you with someone in your life to bless you and elevate your life

--Jacob through Isaac

--God used ppl to promote, bless, lift

--intentional

--things required of you--not get anything for free; there are requirements for that kind of access

--God has put you in other ppl's life to help THEM.  They need to know not to take relationships with you in a casual manner

PROTOTYPE FOR A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP

Elisha and Elijah

We come to PG as role of Elisha

see from the vantage point of both sides

--qualification process they must go through

--on both sides, important to understand

--God wants to bless and promote you through ppl

--for that elevation to happen, relationship has to be healthy, not casual, not false pretenses, no pockets of disrespect, pure solid deep and full of integrity

--so many ppl have missed God's best b/c we don't get it.

--Failed to build the right relationships with right ppl the right way

1 Kings 19, 2 Kings 2--interaction between prophets

--relationship that blesses Elisha's life required some things from him. 

1.  Require you to prove your commitment and respect

Elisha: I want to inherit double portion; if you see me when I'm taken, otherwise not. If you commit to this relationship long enough, go through the highs and lows of ministry and you're still there after all of that, when I've made you mad, after others walk away; 

--stop giving your best to ppl who don't deserve it

--Elijah's been through too much, depths of depression

--he has been through too much

--fly by night ppl; some ppl want mantle they're not ready to wwear

--sometimes we want mantle we are not ready to wear

--Samuel's mom: made coats based on how much she knew he should grow

--healthy relationships will demand a high level of commitment

--staying in difficult relationships

--beware of lack of commitment in this generation

--commitment; respect

--you can't disrespect your Elijah's and expect to receive from them

--disrespect cancels benefit

--disconnect from disrespect

2. GREAT RELATIONSHIPS REQUIRE YOU TO WANT THE BEST FOR THE OTHER PERSON

--elevations and promotions happen figuratively; we must be able to handle that

--unhealthy relationships will crumble under promotion, it's surface

--healthy relationships thrive in seasons of promotion

--you can't take them with you:  Paul and John Mark; how you know when a relationship has run its course, personally or professionally

--dominate theory from jewish and Christian scholars:  Paul and john Mark:  Acts 11; Barnabus and Saul Barnabus and Paul; early journeys; Acts 13; Paul and his companion; theory John Mark couldn't handle elevation that Paul went from understudy to leading the church

--I liked you when you were under somebody

--The moment God opens door and opportunities, some ppl can't handle it; stop investing in those kinds of ppl

3.  REQUIRE YOU TO BE ACTIVELY INVOLVED IN SOMETHING POSITIVE

--learn to celebrate others

--you can't sit around and wait until the ship comes in 

--you need to be actively engaged in something positive

--Elisha is engaged in plowing a field; ppl called to greatness summoned to it while working

--anointing hits a moving target

--movement; keep moving; God's favor connected with positive

--Anything multiplied by zero is zero

--are they doing something positive with what they already have?

--Is your life even worthy to make a deposit

--you've got to be productive where you are; if you aren't productive on the level you're on, who's going to  give you a bigger stage; opportunity for bigger mess?

4.  DEMONSTRATE CAPACITY FOR HEALTHY INTERACTION

--best indicator of future behavior is past behavior

--if not working hard now, why would you expect different work ethic at different level?

--Elisha:  doing what needs to be done; committed to work; here's a person who doesn't need PR for self; you have to learn to be comfortable in their shadow

--Elishas mustn't need applause; not about sharing the stage; God entrusted YOU, not them

--they didn't earn the spot light; they haven't been where you've been

5. NOT MIND GETTING DIRTY

--Elisha's plowing behind oxen, driving; he's comfortable, working and walking through mess; walking working and dealing with mess

--healthy relationships are not perfect, ppl not perfect; mess will be there; challenges, misunderstandings, crises; working through those difficulties that makes relationship strong

--ppl who will walk with you through most diff seasons

--we abandon relationship and throw ppl away b/c they get on our nerves (problem with this generation)

--notion of abandoning them when diff

--prob: that's not the Nature of God

--God has a habit of playing in the dirt

--God's hand in mess, grabs, shapes, gives breath of life into mess

--why so afraid of mess in relationship

--Luke 13;

fig tree with no fruit; dig around it and let me put mess around the victory

--mess is fertilizer for your growth

--mess can help you grow

--we get this pastorally, but not relationally

--we can be trusted with their mess, 

--every relationship not neat and pretty and in box

--messy at first; produce fruit long term;

--great relationships 

6.  WILLING TO SACRIFICE FOR SOMETHING NEW AND BETTER THAN YOU'VE EVER KNOWN BEFORE

--Elisha: let me kiss my parents and then come

--Elijah: 

--we are a limited resource; can't have one foot in this relationship here and one there; intentional and strategic when it comes to having prof relationships

--refuse to have more relationships than you can maintain: Bishop

--can't spread self too thin

--at best, surface relationships

--try too many ppl: become parasite, no deposits

--Elijah:  What have I done to you?  Is this relationship valuable enough to you to sacrifice; not one foot in one relationship, one in another

--stop trying to build relationships with ppl all over the place

--the price/degree of sacrifice determines its value

--ppl want you to cater to whim

--bring a gift every time I see Bishop; relationship is valuable enough to sacrifice something for it

--get it for him first

--we want everything, but we're not willing to sacrifice 

--bring a gift

--this transfer, impartation

--he says more on accident than ppl do on purpose

--sowing seed; what you value is determined by 

--if God moves through you to sacrifice, 

--God brings ppl to us

--I sent word and person

--Willing to sacrifice for it; your willingness to sacrifice

--don't leave this house without giving something to the Man of God; valuable relationship

--God, I see what you're doing;

--Do more in one moment than I can try to make happen in my own life

--Not tool of manipulation or oppressiveness

--Anybody in ministry is going to be overworked and underpaid

--If you're doing this for money, wrong line of work

--IN your marriage

--Love is spelled SACRIFICE

--God's principles

--jewish proverb;  Life is to be lived as a man or woman in rowboat; 

--not motorboat; motor behind you and facing where you're going

--Row boat:  face where you've been and move in direction where you're going

--most people take hurt pain etc. of bad relationships and put behind us and put to where we're going

-reason you need ppl factor; learn the lessons of past; use that as motivation to row into the future; where He's taking you/us

--Get the wisdom and direction; fuel for where he's taking you in the future

--speak:  the rest of your life will be the best relationally